Goodbyes and bus rides

Well, saying goodbye to the children was much harder than I was expecting. The last night I was asked to lead their time of devotion. I talked about heaven and the kingdom of God that is being established here on earth. When those children sing, they bring a bit of that kingdom here. When I told them that, I started crying so hard. I thanked them for all they had done for me and the ways they had served me. They also thanked me and we gave hugs and said goodnight. It was sad.
However! When I was laying in bed I heard someone singing a song that is so familiar to me. We sing it before every soccer game; it is called Sanctuary. I kept looking out my window to see who was singing, and finally I saw that it was a woman named Sarah, who stays at the orphanage to take care of the children and do the laundry and clean. I went outside to talk to her, and all the kids began coming out of their rooms. We all sat outside and joked around together and sang songs. The older kids sang a special goodbye song for me and Viola even wrote a song in English! It was such a wonderful ending to the last night.
I was up at 5AM the next morning to catch my bus to Nairobi. All the older girls got up too to walk me into town. They are so sweet! I boarded the bus around 7, and was gearing up for the 13 hour journey. The man who sat next to me bought me baked bananas for breakfast and he was really nice. When it came time to cross the border, I was really nervous! Thankfully everything worked out fine and I got across and bought a Kenyan visa for only $25. once I crossed, the men kept following me and hitting on me and asking for money. I was so overwhelmed! I nearly ran back to the bus to get away. Once back on the road, the drive was horrible. We faced extremely bumpy roads for over an hour. Then, I was hoping it would rain because the bus was really hot, and it did rain! Unfortunately, I just happened to be sitting by the window that leaked, and when I mean leaked, I mean poured. I tried to use my pillow to stop it from raining on me, but it soaked through my whole pillow. Then I got up and moved to the back of the bus where it was dry. I was feeling really sick so I hung in the aisle and tried to look out the front window. A man then got on the bus and was trying to sell us something, and he sstood right in front of me and yelled. Next thin g I know, we are off-roadng again and I really got sick. We were on those roads for nearly an hour and a half. At the soonest chance I got up and sat in the very front seat, and sat comfortably for the final 2 hours of the trip. The last two hours were beautiful! The mountains were wonderful and the sun was setting. I also saw hundred of zebra and thousands of falmengos. Now I am safely and happily in Kenya. I have been hanging out with my friends and with coach josh. It’s been fun!
There is a quote from Saint Augustine that I try to live by. He says, ‘always speak of God’s love, if necessary, use words.’ If you have been following this blog at all, I think you have been able to tell that I love words. I love writing, I love speaking, I love encouraging people. I believe that God has blessed me with that gift. However, sometimes my liking from words becomes more about me than about God. It is me who preached the gospel, or me who touched someone’s life, not the Lord. once I came here, he took it away and put me in a place where nobody understood the words that I used. Trying to share Gods love without speaking was a huge challenge for me! I reached a moment where I came to the end of myself. No longer was I able to stand on my own; rather, God needed to work because I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t fully understand how to speak of God’s love without using words, but I believe it has to do a lot with just trying to love people. A lot of times when I was in Uganda, I ignored people because I didn’t like the things they were yelling at me. That would be a bad example of loving people. I was watching a televangelist preach about being Jesus’ hands and feet, and he said that in our lifetimes, we come in contact with over 100,000 people. Wow! Each interaction we have with people in an opportunity to bring the kingdom of heaven to earth, or the kingdom of hell to earth. You can either value someone as a human, or you can ignore them and show that you believe you are better than them .you can build people up, or tear them down. I have been challenged by all of this. I don’t have a conclusion, but I have found that I, myself, don’t have the capacity to just love people as they are. It is only when I am aware of God’s love for me and am secure in who He says I am that I am able to love people.
The end for now. I am on a standby flight for Saturday. A little sooner than I was hoping, but it is either that or july, and I really feel that I am supposed to come home.